Person O’Haran and Brandy, two male actors who star in motorcycle movies, beat up several biker gang members before the director says, “Cut and print.” However, Brandy is disgusted with the scene because it lacks realism; how could he and Person “knock out four guys in two seconds?” When the director announces that the scene is “a wrap,” Brandy gets angry because he did not have a close-up for his “best lines in the movie.” Fed up with making low-budget movies for “$15 a day,” Brandy and Person, still wearing their leather jackets and boots, steal their motorcycles from the set and drive to Los Angeles, California. Seeing one of their movies on the marquee of a theater on Hollywood Boulevard, they try to talk their way inside but neither one has enough money, and the theater manager does not recognize them. The actors ride to Brandy’s house and camp in the back yard, but when Brandy’s wife nags him, he convinces Person that it is time to go on the road to become their onscreen characters. They ride to the San Diego, California, beach house of Person’s sister, Brigitte O’Haran, who has left a note on the door welcoming them, even though Person did not tell her they were coming. At a nearby truck stop, they see a former motorcycle gang member and current truck driver, Frankie, and blackmail him into buying them meals, but when Frankie leaves, he runs his vehicle over the motorcycles. By the time Person and Brandy push their bikes back to Brigitte’s house, she has returned from her job and says she knew they were coming because her horoscope predicted it. Also knowing that Brandy is a Sagittarius, she says that he will be betrayed by a woman, then tricks him in front of Person, which convinces Brandy that astrology is valid and can earn him a lot of money betting on football games. Certain of his future financial success, Brandy talks Brigitte into loaning him and Person her Volkwagen Beetle. However, they are both ashamed to be riding in the little car when members of the Golden Horde motorcycle gang recognize them. When Brandy runs into a telephone pole trying to escape, he and Person are beaten. As sirens approach, Person and Brandy catch a bus to the law office where Brigitte works and get her fired when Brandy hits one of the attorneys. Now that Brigette needs money as much as Person and Brandy, she devises a scheme to procure a $3,500 bank loan, buy marijuana in Mexico, and bring it back to California. She tells Person and Brandy she needs the birth date of one of the border guards, so that she can work up a horoscope and figure out a good time to slip the marijuana past him. After Person and Brandy shave their beards, Brigitte lures a policeman, Hal, to her house, seduces him, and tosses his uniform out the window. Using the uniform and Hal’s police car, Brandy sets up a roadblock near Tijuana so he can check the drivers’ licenses of border guards to find out who was born in a certain month. Brandy settles on a guard named Charlie and takes the man’s birth date, along with Hal’s police car and uniform, back to Brigitte while she is still in bed with Officer Hal. Before Hal leaves in the morning, he tells Brigitte he knows a Tijuana drug smuggler named Juan who is a Virgo. With her bank loan, Brigitte buys an old pickup truck, on which Person paints “Nursery” and “Specializing in Orchids” on the door. Once Person and Brandy are in Tijuana, Juan takes them to his friend, Miguelito, a.k.a. Michael, who sells them a load of marijuana that they cover with horse manure in the back of the pickup. Charlie, the border guard, pulls them over because he is suspicious about the manure despite its fertilizer effect on orchids, but he becomes so enraptured by telling his own Korean War stories that he waves them on. However, as soon as the two return to Brigitte’s, Officer Hal hijacks the marijuana and confesses that he knew what was going on because he had looked at Brigitte’s birth date and figured out her horoscope. Person and Brandy are so angry that they rent a tank at an Army surplus store, drive it to the local police station, smash Hal’s squad car in front of other policemen, and lead the precinct on a chase through San Diego streets and Balboa Park. When the tank runs out of gas, they flee to a midget who runs a hot-air balloon concession and hijack his balloon, sailing into the sky as the police converge on them.