In Paris, France, a mime performs as a red, white, and blue truck backs into his space. The back of the truck opens and the band “Los Guys,” two American musicians, play rock-n-roll until the crowd pays them to stop. Later, in a cafe, a Gypsy fortune-teller shares the story of the Corsican Brothers, Luis and Lucien, with Los Guys. In 18th-century France, Luis and Lucien’s apparent father, an aristocrat, nervously awaits their birth. When they are delivered as fraternal twins of different fathers, their mother flees, and the boys’ two progenitors die following a duel. Orphaned, the boys are raised as peasants with a bond so strong that they feel the other’s joy and pain. Nine years later, they inadvertently burn down their adopted home and are separated. Another twenty-one years later, they are reunited when Luis returns to France after spending two decades in Mexico. Lucien explains that evil men rule France and he has become a revolutionary to oppose them. The most notable of the evil men is a preening fop named Fuckaire, the Queen’s functionary. Later, Luis and Lucien are captured by Fuckaire’s men and led to the guillotine. Lucien volunteers to be the first to die for the revolution, but Luis realizes it is he who will feel the pain and starts a fight with the Royal Guards. The crowd, including the Queen’s two daughters, is impressed by the brothers’ bravery and Fuckaire decides to spare their lives, choosing instead to torture them. In the palace dungeon, Lucien pours molten excrement on Fuckaire and the brothers escape. Luis enters the royal stable and misinterprets one of Princess II’s loving remarks to her horse as being directed toward him. Meanwhile, Lucien swings into the room of Princess I, who has fallen in love with him. Later, Lucien finds Luis in a tavern and they quarrel when they believe they are in love with the same princess. To settle their disagreement, the brothers engage in a sword fight, but realize their mistake when the princesses arrive. Princess I forces Luis to groom her horse, while Lucien and his Princess II kiss passionately nearby. The following day, the brothers impersonate the Queen’s Spanish hairdresser and the prophet, Nostrodamus, and enter the palace as part of the Marquis Du Hickey’s entourage. As Luis styles the Queen’s hair, Lucien goes in search of the perfect sword. Later, Lucien attempts to show Luis the swords he located and they enter a room full of courtiers. When the princesses walk in and misinterpret the situation, the brothers pursue the royal sisters to explain. Lucien, disguised as Nostrodamus, finds Princess II, but Luis, costumed as the hairdresser, is shackled and whipped by Fuckaire. As Lucien experiences Luis’s pain, the princess thinks he is dancing to entertain her. When Lucien locates and frees Luis, Fuckaire insists they shackle and whip him. The brothers have an opportunity to escape, but Lucien insists they stay to fight, and the Royal Guards imprison them. In the dungeon, Luis questions his brother’s revolutionary ideals, bemoaning their missed opportunity to flee. Lucien uses a stale loaf of bread to pry open the bars on a window and escape, but Luis is distracted by hunger and left behind. Later, on the day Luis is to be executed by Fuckaire, Lucien rallies the oppressed people of France to rescue his brother. A battle ensues, the peasants storm the castle, and Fuckaire dies in an explosion. Later, a grand feast is held and the brothers plan to marry the princesses. However, on their wedding day, Luis has a vision of an unhappy future, and he accepts Lucien’s suggestion that they go to America and start another revolution. Back in present-day Paris, at the conclusion of the Corsican Brothers saga, Los Guys perform their music to an indifferent audience at an outdoor cafe.